GRINDER GOT HIM

A friend of mine is being made into sausage. It is a slow process. It entails trips through two govt bureaucracies and meetings with many govt officials. Much paper is wasted, and the end result is always a final declaration of guilt.

The victim this time is Douglas Cauldwell, 431137, referred to as "Elmo" by his friends. I forgot what he's in here for, but I remember that it was something petty, and only worth about five years. He's on Oklahoma's criminal display net, probably as some kind of sneak thief. He's a little, agile guy, amusing to speak with, and always in good humor. Though he's about 22 years old, he's a bit of a juvenile. He's fairly acrobatic, walking on his hands, doing flying summersaults and playing well at the usual sports. He's a fierce terrier, too. We were playing volleyball once when a big, yellow-toothed numbskull contrived to get himself hit with the ball for attention, (Eric Hartman). He cried about how he might throw the ball over the razor wire. where nobody could get it. Elmo told this punk, "You throw that ball over the fence and see what happens!" Yellowteeth changed his mind rather quickly, then decided to no longer loiter in the danger zone pretending to direct his attention elsewhere.

Elmo didn't get much money sent to him by his family. He thus had to accumulate money in other ways. He fixed shoes for other captives, did their laundry sometimes, worked as a bookie, selling parlay tickets for a small cut of the profits. He bought low and sold high whenever there was a margin on anybartering he could facilitate. There are numerous small ways for an active, friendly guy to make small change in prison.

Trouble is, small change doesn't go far when the cops and guards make a few crumbs of marijuana cost so dearly. Prison is deliberately made so extremely boring that men's minds and mental capacities actually shrink. This is not just some regular nonsense made up by anti-cage propagandists: this is irrefutable scientific fact known since the 1950s or earlier by virtually every learned member of academe. Yon take away stimuli, brain function diminishes, same as if you'd cut off a limb. Marijuana cuts the boredom and is thus slightly therapeutic against mental shrinkage due to the illegalization of most prisoner stimuli.

High demand. Short supply. The math said, "Elmo, you need a higher rate of pay." So he traversed all the bureaucratic hoops necessary to obtain the highest pay grade possible. It took six months, and at the end he made a whopping 50¢/hour working the shittiest job in the prison industrial area spray painting metal and wooden objects on an assembly line. All of his considerable abilities at dexterity, endurance, willingness to do the extra work better and faster than anyone else, plus his apparent sincerity in clicking up to the bosses and laughing with the guards as they denigrated him still didn't result in enough money to cover his needs. Price gouging ran rampant. The prison food was largely inedible to persons not raised in ghettos. Prison food is mostly variations on only s couple of themes: ground guts stuffed in an intestine (special prison-made balonas, salamis, sausages and dogs, all light on meat, heavy on gristle, cartilage, tendon and ligament) and ground guts concealed

within gravy or a sticky, breaded husk, often itself hidden beneath gravy to discourage the curious from examining it too closely. Garbage served as food forces men with weak stomachs to buy high-priced fast- and junk-foods from the guard-supplied stores. Also, there is a constant effort by the politicians, cops, prisoncrats and the media whores to stampede ignorant, vengeful citizens into voting prisoners' money into the pockets of politicians, cops, prisoncrats and victims. With so many hundreds of greedy fingers plucking at the money prisoners' families send, it is obvious that much of the prisoner economy would be driven underground.

This is exactly what Elmo had to participate in to avoid mental shrinkage, obtain some peace and avoid the usual prison food ailments of diarrhea and colon cancer (from tainted "meats" and a lack of salad and fiber), and brain and bladder cancers (from artificial "fruit" drinks and a lack of citrus), to name only the most prevalent. Specifically, Elmo decided to become a smuggler. Even though there only averages about one "stabbing" per year at this prison, the sale of home-made "knives" is fairly lucrative. The four gangs (Indians, Latinos, Negros and Caucasians) all greatly fear getting their just desserts for the crimes they perpetrate on each other and stand-alone individuals. Mostly they "buy" dope with a promise to pay, then turn deadbeat when they perceive an opportunity to safely welsh on their debts. Dope-addicts tend to buy more dope rather than pay for dope previously consumed. Also they steal from each other when the opportunity presents, and they like to gather their "posse"            and rob defenseless people not members of any gang. The third popular gang activity is to simply declare selected individuals as "snitches", "baby-rapers" or other incendiary terms and use these bald accusations as excuses to mob-up, beat the hated person senseless and, of course, steal everything of value that he possesses. Then they go hide in their lairs and become very paranoid about their deeds, worrying mostly about the possibility of getting caught out solo by another gang or former victim. Hence the value of a collection of shiny, sharp, professional-looking knives to brandish for both protection and intimidation, rather than actual killing. (There hasn't been an inmate attack among Oklahoma's 24,000 prisoners that has resulted in an actual death for about two years. Also, no Oklahoma guards have ever been killed by a prisoner in 100 years of operation except for one poor guy named Cox, in a 1979 escape from the McAlester chicken barn.)

A good knife smuggled in from the machine shop can sell for $25. Elmo successfully got one past the metal-detecting wands. The "Nazi" gang paid quickly in cash. Then they ordered three more at wholesale prices, with promises to buy Elmo's entire production. They also offered Elmo sage advice on how to smuggle out three knives at once: just wrap them in special plastic! (I was hoping that this is just a gossip-garbled, short-hand way of relaying something like, "You got to shrink-wrap it tightly to the inside of your thigh, high up in your crotch..." This way I could still have a small hit of respect for the workings of the Caucasian minds, however mal- or un-educated they may be. Further investigation revealed similar nonsense being widely believed and touted as fact. It's as if these people stopped learning in sixth grade, then forgot everything down to the fourth grade! My research indicates two main causes for the stupidization of our youngest generations: Television crime dramas and lack of school. Anyway, Elmo got busted on his second trip past the metal detecting wands and was dragged off to deeper, more isolated cages for further societal exploitation. He will be assigned a lawyer who will conspire with the judge/DA team to terrorize Elmo into accepting

a "bargain" of 20 more years in prison in order to avoid a jury that would happily slam him with a life sentence for his crime.

If, by some miracle, he has the courage and intelligence to dodge the deal which will triple or quadruple his original sentence(depending upon if the judge/DA team has to illegally run it "consecutively" with his original sentence in order to get Elmo to accept it) Elmo still will suffer all the pitfalls of facing a jury. His "Public Defender" will manipulate him so that lie does not even try to defend himself. He will be a passive, angry bystander/ observer as the prosecutor professionally terrorizes the jurors with fanciful tales of gruesome, bloody murders, gang wars, escape attempts, hostage-takings and guard-killings. Not one word of the fact that this is nothing more than an economic crime will escape to where the jurors can consider it. No one will be told the fact that the primary use of the knives will be nothing more than to scare off retribution by other thugs. No one will profit but the courthouse crew and the prisoncrats, who will make about $30,000/yr. off Elmo for an extremely long, unnecessary time. Lastly, all this will be gladly paid for by the gullible, ignorant taxpayers who have not the slightest idea that they are being daily raped by the most colossal edifice of corrupt professional parasites ever to wear silk suits.