LAWYERS CALL JURY DUTY "FUN"

A newspaper in Boston, put out by lawyers for lawyers claims to have done a study and gave its finding to the news-starved media who dutifully broadcast this self-serving pap as fact.

As could have been easily predicted merely from knowledge of its source, the lawyers "study" concludes that jurors come to enjoy their time forced into lawyer-service once they submit. (Undoubtedly this is why a Dallas, Texas judge had to send his bailiffs out to abduct people off the streets to force them to perform jury duty when most learned that they needn't respond to his summons.) Also, the lawyers say, juror-duty somehow instills into jurors faith in the lawyer system. The lawyer's propaganda piece goes on to admit to two common complaints jurors have; low pay and a lack of respect unnamed persons have for jurors.            .

This study, spewed by various media monday, 8-14-00, is a thinly disguised attempt to induce more fools to buy into the farce of judicial process so that they can be in doctrinated with renewed awe of lawyerdom, much like elementary school children were forced into prayer and pledges of allegiance before they were able to think for themselves.

As the system works now, jurors are selected much like blood-donors. The people who "donate" the most blood are low-income alcoholics living on the street. Their wits are too slow to make but a marginal living at best. Jurors are slow-witted too, and recently have been legislated to come from the ranks of people who merely own cars rather than land and other real-estate, thus they require patriotisation, which is the unstated purpose of the "study". Jurors need to be drunk on patriotism or have a need for revenge upon criminals to work properly as jurors, same as elemental history texts say Hitler needed revenge upon Jews. Only the slowest, most patriotic, most gullible and most vengeful are preferentially selected for jury duty. Defense attorneys, to their credit, occasionally, half-assedly, try to get their bosses (the judges and district attorneys) to raise the token payment awarded jurors in hope of attracting persons with actual peer-experience and quality freethinking abilities, qualities most often found in persons who have to actually break a sweat for a living and who normally can't afford the luxury of losing a day of work donated to the edification of lawyers. Judges, prosecutors, the coplobby and the city, state and fed gov'ts all gang up to veto this. They like their jurors just the way they are now: stupid, vengeful, and mindlessly patriotic. When the prosecutor, judge or cop grunts, the jurors leap to attention, click their heels in unison and salute with such force as to leave permanent dents in their frontal lobes. Consequently, defense lawyers can not win, must suffer 99.7% conviction rates and thus stampede to the prosecutor's side so they can enjoy a 99% success rate, extremely high pay and inevitable high political office with the ability to sell quickly nothing more than influence, thanks to his juror "friends".