CITIZEN'S POLICE PROFILE PROFILE

Are police attracted to you? Do they appear out of nowhere end demand answers of you? Are you s cop-magnet always defending yourself from their accusations? If so, it could be your fault and easily corrected. Take the quiz below to see if you are exuding invisible bust-me waves:

Vehicle Points Driver/passengers Points

new/sedan/wagon -1 old -1

over 10 years old +2 white -1

dirty, needs carwash +1 yellow -2

van in rural area +2 red/brown +2

motorcycle +1 black . +3

expired tag/safety sticker +3 young +1

liberal or pro-freedom children -2

bumper stickers +5 mixed races +4

Grateful Dead logos +5 Home Points

Pro-cop insignia -1 house with cut lawn -1

baby seat/toys -1 apt. with junk cars +1

car full of junk +1 RV +2

litterbag and/or exposed, car +3

empty ash tray -1 homeless +6

beer cans +5 Attire Points

Hair Points tie/business shirt -3

flat top -3 suit/briefcase -3

crew cut -2 nerd glasses -1

bald -1 sunglasses +2

short +1 blue jeans +1 .

long/bushy +2 tees with rock logos +3

facial +3 tattoos +6

spiked/dyed +3 shorts/sandals +2

dreadlocks +4 Demeanor Points

afro +3 ghetto slang +3

shiny leather shoes -1 prison slang +4

camo pants +3 dialated eyes +2

bright colors +1 red eye +2

backward ballcap +2 alcohol small +3

sideways ballcap +3 staggers +4

cowboy hat +1 slurred speech +3

sports jacket with logo: stupor/snoring +6

in summer +3 happy/nervous +3

bandana/headband +3 angry/sullen +3

sock hat/ski mask +4 stinking -1

Add up your score and discover your natural station in life. Zero and below = ordinary tax-fodder. One through ten = constant penalty/fee-paying trick for the government's pimps. Ten to twenty = heavy fine dupe. Twenty and up = taxpayer-subsidized slave and cop/lawcrat goldmine.

In their ceaseless search for the perfect donut and largest fines, the mobile hedged tax-collectors first are attracted to you by your vehicle or attire. The color of expired tag/tax/safety stickers draws them like botflies to a rotting carcass. Next, they look for old cars with young, dark-skinned drivers wearing sunglasses and bushy hair who drive fast.

Behavior modification is survival: no shirt, no shoes, no freedom. Endangered species must learn camouflage, else natural selection will cause extinction and replacement by the more politically active, privileged and hereditarily-advantaged species. Knowledge is power; ignorance is death.

Much as freedom lovers detest it, the Gluttons Of Privilege rule the world. To them, everyone is guilty of something, and finding it only takes the right pretext. Privacy is outlawed, and nasal hallucinations open every door and lock.

But hope continues. It will not be easy to enlighten the presently entrenched Oligarchs, but thanks to the new powers of information dissemination and public assembly provided 6y the net, citizens can regain control. Electronic voting will make our deaf, distracted politicians obsolete. Direct democracy is near. Mis- and dis- and even mal-representation by our cash-chasing electocrats can end. Help replace our poll-iticians with adding machines. Referendum, People's Initiative Petition and Recall rights can expand voting privileges to the issues themselves instead of issue-ducking rhetoric-artists. Fire the crooks, hire statesmen, write our OWN legislation, UNrepeal the Constitution and even update it into the 19th century and beyond; all in days instead of decades. Buggy-whip, horse-drawn govt service need no longer limit 21st century man. Let your imagination and drive propel us into modern social contracts. Dispair kills. Vision breathes life. Life is long. Outlive the fossils. Innovate, adapt, prosper.